dinnernet anyone????

May 19, 2008 at 4:10 pm | Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment

“SAVE THAT” OF THE DAY

Where are the damn chips – Kellie Rasberry

KIDD KRADDICK IMPERSONATION

Kidd recreating the shrill guitar sounds that he suggested Freddy change on Defying Gravity

FUNNIEST THING HEARD ON THE SHOW TODAY

Al just ran right into his microphone

DAILY SUCKING UP TO RYAN SEACREST MOMENT

Kidd saying that the Denise Richard’s reality show is gonna be GRRREAT – um, who really believes that nonsense?? You know it’s gonna SUCK IT!! But that didn’t stop Kidd from mentioning Ryan Seacrest FIVE times!! Boy, I hope they hurry up and close the deal with Freddy’s reality show with a quickness – because I’m already tired of us having to suck up tio Ryan – I liked it better when we made fun of him! Today’s random Ryan Seacrest mentions – up to 5

“Things You Might Hear On Today’s Show”

Kellie is so skinny that the designer jeans bought for his Favorite Things are too big!!

Al is on match.com and has gotten anything but winks

J Si feels vindicated because MTV rated Lil Wayne the #3 rapper instead of #1 like Kidd said

Shanon fell asleep at her own party

So Big Al has his feelings hurt because no one is actually making the effort to talk to him on match.com – so he decided to make the first move – too bad some girl realized that he was Big Al Mack from the radio – she sent him a note that said “your that dude from the radio – move on radio man, your pathetic” – and Al, having his feelings hurt, decided to clown her – he messaged her back and said, “at least I know the difference in when to use you’re and your – I’d rather be pathetic than a dumbass!” now those are pretty strong words coming from Big Al – I think being dumped by Bartendica has made him bitter – and if you heard his Weekend Rap Up, you’ll see that it’s true – this week’s Weekend Rap Up was another long one – but this one was worth it – Al’s been in a funk for the last couple of months since his break up with Bartendica – and it’s really affected all the areas of his life- but with his lifelong dream coming to fruition this weekend (2 Gay Guys in a Bucket), he’s decided to turn the funk around and count his blessings instead of dwelling on the negative and the woulda/coulda/shouldas – he’s even decided that he will find love again – normally I take any opportunity to slam Al – but I’m really proud of him – It may not be much but it sounds like Al is nearing, dare I say it … MATURITY?!?! say it isn’t so 😉

Freddy Update

It takes about $8000 to have one of Freddy’s song mixed – and we’ve made about $300 while he was on the road and another $300 for Freddy’s song being used on The Bachelorette – so we only have to make another $7400 – Kidd hung out with Freddy this weekend and sat in while they mixed and produced Freddy’s songs on iChat – too bad Kidd didn’t really know what he was doing – in the meantime, Freddy has written another song and this time it relates to our very own Big Al – with Big Al’s new found positivity and his determination that he will find someone and not end up alone, Freddy’s new song is called “Find You”

Will this show ever learn? Kidd decided to call Justin Timberlake – why? Because he has his number – pay no attention to the fact that Justin totally blew off Kidd the last time he called and texted him – and disregard the fact that it’s 4am in L.A. – aren’t you anxious to answer calls from unknown numbers in the middle of the night – I know it’s shocking, but Justin didn’t answer – I’ve given up on thinking that Justin will ever be BFFs with Kidd – I need Kidd to let go of the Justin dream and focus on Joel Madden – then he can hook me up with Nicole Richie (who I love) and she and I can become BFFs – helloooo … all about me!!

HIZZLE

Ashlee Simpson and Pete Wentz are officially married

Carmen Electra is mad because her engagement ring came from an internet site

Will Smith is building a school for his kids

The CW has cancelled a ton of shows

The American Idol finals are tonight and tomorrow there will be a new American Idol – I’m guessing the winner will be David – ha-ha-ha – I’m HI-larious – and in case you’re wondering the most popular American Idol ever … Carrie Underwood – and the most overrated contestant this season … Jason Castro – I’m sure there will be more AI talk Wednesday and even more on Thursday since we’ll know who the winner is then – and as for me, well I’ll be doing something much more important – like counting gray hairs or something …

Can you believe that Freddy has never been to WalMart?? WHAAAA?? I mean I understand he’s from the big city and they don’t have a lot of extra land for the expansive greatness that is WalMart – but never?? I can’t imagine – I’m a girl that hit up WalMart at least 4 or 5 times a week – at least I did before the baby was born – now it’s just too much of an effort to pack her up and head out every day – so I’ve had to condense my trips into a once or twice a week trip – so I can’t even fathom never having experienced the greatness – so Kellie, who loves WalMart as much as me, has volunteered to share her love of WalMart with Freddy – stay tuned

SHOWBIZ TOP 5

#5 – Nicole Kidman had a pregnant meltdown at a Cracker Barrel in Tennessee

#4 – Kate Hudson is dating Lance Armstrong, NOT Owen Wilson

#3 – Gossip Girl stars are making out in public

#2 – Heidi and Spencer ran up a $783 tab and only left a $16 tip

#1 – Ashley Simpson and Pete Wentz are married

Inside The Brain of An 8th Grader

Shannon, Hayley and Kimberly are 8th graders and they stopped by the show to give us some insight into what 8th grade girls are thinking – it’s been a while since I was in 8th grade – not so long that I don’t remember what 8th grade was like though – and pretty much everything they mentioned, I remember thinking – thinking you’re the coolest kid in school whether anyone else thought so or not – excited about going to high school, new experiences, new friends and new boys!! What do they want to be when they grow up? Actress, Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader, professional soccer player – yeah, I didn’t have a ton of realistic career aspirations at that age – 8th grade is a pretty narcissistic age – as proven by the girl who said she’s saving the earth by buying a green bag – not because she really cares about the environment, but because the bag is so freaking cute! Welcome to 8th grade!!

I know Kidd must be getting sad – after all, his baby girl is getting ready to graduate from high school – and they had a big party for her this weekend, complete with alcohol treats for the adults – the problem with alcohol treats is as you consume them, stupid ideas suddenly seem like good ideas – things like showing your teenager “how it’s done” – here’s a word to the wise – there are very few situations where adults where adults should be dancing within the vicinity if their children – things like weddings and family reunions are okay – proms and high school parties? Not okay!! Unless of course you’re looking for a way to purposely embarrass your children – after all, the power of humiliation is the only power you truly have over your children – remember that – I know I will!

MOMENT WHEN I REALIZED KIDD HAD TOO MUCH DIET COKE

Kellie is thinking about having a dinner party – but instead of saying dinner party, she said dinnernet party – this led into Kidd and Al coming up with the concept of the dinnernet party – you set up a webcam at your computer and hook up with all of your friends while they’re at their computers and have dinner together – Kidd was all over it until he found out the domain was already taken – it was a moment of sadness – but not a moment of calmness – the concept put Kidd into overdrive – A.D.D. and caffeine at it’s best

Best Bit of the Day

Al needs new permits for his bar and one of the guys offered to bribe the Mexican government for him so that he won’t have to wait the 60 days to get what he needs – we questioned whether it was really that easy – can you just call up the Mexican government and ask for the department that gives permits to people who are willing to slip the officials a little extra cash? According to J Si, the answer is yes – just call up Manuel and get this thing done – I wish I could put into words just how great this bit was – but you’ll just have to listen to the K Pod – but listen for the following words: bribery, blackmail, extortion, drug running, kidnapping, corruption and prostitution

Kellie has lost a ton of weight but like she said, “she still has time to screw it up” – I’m a tad bit concerned because she is skinnier than I have ever seen her- she’s actually skinnier than anyone on the show has ever seen her – but I trust her and I know she wouldn’t do anything that would jeopardize her health – because she’s got Emma Kelly to think about it – but it’s still a little disconcerting – anyway, i’m not going to reveal her weight – but I think a lot of people are going to be shocked on Friday!!

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