i think we have Hillary on the phone right now …

June 9, 2008 at 4:27 pm | Posted in Uncategorized | 4 Comments

“SAVE THAT” OF THE DAY

I’m only interested if you’re black – Kellie Rasberry – does it really matter why she said it/? I didn’t think so!

BEHIND THE SCENES

J Si missed Eminem on the Jimmy Kimmel before the NBA game – and spent half the morning trying to prove that he wasn’t sad about it – look at this face and tell me he isn’t sad!

KIDD KRADDICK IMPERSONATION

“Hillary Clinton is in the studio right now” – thanks to Big Al, Kidd had to pull out his Hillary Clinbton impersonation – but why did Hillary sound strangely like Trista from The Bachelorette??   it’s a good thing that Hillary didn’t win the nomination because Kidd’s impression of Hillary is not what I would call stellar – and neither were his impressions of Sarah Jessica Parker or Ashanti – they all sounded exactly like Trista – I think the real question is why is Kidd’s impression of Trista so good!

FUNNIEST LINE OF THE SHOW

Somebody gave my microphone Cialis – Kidd when his microphone kept rising up in the air on it’s own

MOST UNCOMFORTABLE MOMENT ON THE SHOW

Have you ever had salmon wieners – Kidd in reference to Regis and Kelly’s Golden Weiner award

“Things You Might Hear On Today’s Show”

Kellie’s weekend started off crappy – um, she started off the weekend with us

Al had a family member hang up on him for the first time ever

J Si’s sister hung up on him and deleted him from her MySpace list because her boyfriend told her to

Shanon got texts from Big Al all weekend and she thinks he was drunk

Kidd is pumped because the new iPhone info comes out today

Today is National Donald Duck Day – and in honor of the day, Kidd wanted everyone to talk in their Donald Duck voice – so we started off with Al – only Al’s impression was pretty bad – and instead of just owning up to the fact that he sucks at Donald Duck impressions (or in Al’s case, all impressions), Al tried to say that black people can’t do Donald Duck impressions – Kidd called him out by pointing out that Al uses the “Black people don’t do XYZ” excuse anytime he can’t do something – I hadn’t heard that but I’m sure gonna use that in the future – after all, I couldn’t do a Donald Duck impression when Kidd asked me to do it – so maybe there’s something to Al’s theory after all – next we asked for calls because Kidd wanted to have a … wait for it … DUCK OFF – we had a couple of random impressions but the winner had to be Barrington who did the Jamaican Donald Duck – I wasn’t aware that all you need to speak Jamaican was adding the word “mon” on the end of your sentence

HIZZLE

Jessica Simpson wants Tony Romo to be in her next video

David Beckham bought Posh a vineyard for her birthday

Jessica Alba had a baby girl

Finally, something for BGJ to do besides sitting next to Al – Rupert Evert made som stupid comments about soldiers fighting wars being wimps – he made a statement and since Rupert is British, we made BGJ read it – and there is your BGJ fix for the day

For Trip A Day, we played “Who on the Show”

Who on the show hit a girl in the face spiking a volleyball

Who got a horrible rash on their foot probably by wearing tainted bowling shoes

Who got a ride home from a club by 3 married women

Who on the show got texted by an ex at 2:30am saying “come get me”

ANSWERS

J Si

Shanon

Big Al

Kellie

FREDDY UPDATE

Freddy is in the process of hiring his band  and despite the fact that most band members work for thousands of dollars, Freddy has managed to find some decent people who work for a couple of hours a day

Freddy hired a video guy to film him for $50 a day – the only problem is that the guy is narcoleptic – so as he followed Freddy, he would randomly fall asleep –

Defying Gravity is available on iTunes – and Freddy is the most downloaded Freddy on iTunes

Sad news alert – BGJ has a girlfriend – they’ve been dating for about a year and a half so it’s pretty serious 0 and although they haven’t discussed it in depth, it looks like marriage is in their future – plus, she’s really cute – but she’s not perfect – word on the street is that she has a gimp foot – something about some kind of wayward growing toe that she had to have surgically corrected – I’m thinking this could DQ her, I mean – yeah it’s fixed now but what if this is some type of hereditary defect that they could pass on to their children – I say you find another girl BGJ – besides, she’s about a foot shorter than you!!  Kidd is hoping that they will get married soon – soon like, Thursday at 7:10am – ya think that will happen?

Cupcakes!!!!  See how easy it is for this show to get distracted – a local bakery showed up with cupcakes and the whole show stopped down – never let it be said that this isn’t a show that loves food – and speaking of food – Kidd likes to cook and will often bring leftovers and force, I mean offer, them to the show – today’s tasty sampling … chicken – it would be great except that Kidd gets offended when you don’t want to taste his latest concoction – yeah, see I don’t like chicken – which explains why I didn’t want to eat this …

Inside the dude brain – is there a scarier place?  not that I can think of – except maybe inside the brains of the dudes on this show – so J Si’s friend is hanging out at a bar and strikes up a random conversation with some chick sitting next to him – well, it turns out that this chick has a boyfriend – one that happens to be a little jealous – and he thinks J Si’s friend is hitting on his girl and punches him – J Si left out a couple of details but somehow his friend ended up in jail – but instead of telling the truth, J Si’s friend told his girl that he tripped over his friend’s turtle and hit his head on the table – really??  Is your girlfriend an idiot?  You’re gone all night (because you know he left out the jail story) and come home with a black eye and I’m supposed to believe you tripped over a turtle??  But telling the truth would never occur to a guy because women are crazy, irrational beings who would automatically assume that her boyfriend was hitting on the chick at the bar – dude, haven’t any of these people ever heard of trust??  And you know that story is going to come back to bite him in the butt – like when the notice from the jail comes to the house – I hope J Si is as forthcoming with the story when that happens!!

Kidd watched Joel Osteen on 60 Minutes last night and was surprisingly impressed by his message -Joel is what Kelly refers to as a feel good preacher – there’s no fire and brimstone here – just a lot of “the Lord loves you and wants you to be prosperous” – I don’t know about you, but that would make me feel good – but Kidd, being the skeptic that he is, kept waiting for the other shoe to drop – but it never did – Kidd actually enjoyed Joel’s message and thinks that Joel is a good guy – we took a couple of calls about Joel and there was quite a bit of debate on the who/what/where/when and why of his money making – I don’t have a strong opinion one way or the other – he seems like a good guy and if his message leads some people to God who wouldn’t have gotten there any other way, isn’t that a good thing?  Maybe it’s just me, but I’m willing to bet there will be quite a bit of discussion about Joel on the Kiddlive message board – is I’m not too bored later, I may go check it out

SHOWBIZ TOP 5

#5 – David Cook and David Archuleta have both signed with Jive Records

#4 – Spencer Pratt and Heidi Montag have earned $3 million over the last 2 years

#3 – Jessica Alba and Cash Warren had their baby girl and named her Honor Marie Warren

#2 – Paris Hilton was drinking and smoking all over Vegas so I guess she’s not pregnant

#1 – Miley Cyrus is grounded because she’s been getting a little too mouthy

It was never more obvious how perfect J Si and Kinsey are for each other until last night – we all know that J Si is a member of the fake self esteem nation, but who would have predicted that Kinsey is too – J Si and Kinsey were watching the NBA finals last night when Kinsey declared that calling the game was easy and that she could do it – I’m so glad that J SI was able to roll tape – you’ll have to listen to the KPod to get the true appreciation, but here’s a teaser of things that were said …

Oh Doug Flutie

Vince Young plays for Donovan McNabb – I forget who he plays for

Leo with his model girlfriend

And B.O.S. has 93 (um, it’s BOSTON Kinsey …)

The white, I mean the Boston has it

That was a good try

It’s 78 to 96

And straight from Tigernamestony07’s head, “Why are the Lakers playing an Irish singing group J Si?”

I was a little disappointed that she didn’t say “J Si what the hell” but the rest was so funny, I let it pass!

I was pretty excited about this bit because I have no idea what to get my husband for Father’s Day – so when Kidd said he had the perfect list of what to get and what not to get for Father’s Day – I’m thinking, SCORE!!  Yeah, not so much …

THINGS DAD DOES NOT WANT FOR FATHER’S DAY

Cartoon tie

A useless coupon for a free high 5

Anything fart related

Boxers

Anything that makes fun of dad for being a bad golfer

Slippers and robes

A “Kiss the Cook” apron

Something that is really for you – like granite countertops

Anything that you say came from the dog

THINGS DAD DOES WANT FOR FATHER’S DAY

A mistress (um, where do they sell those???  And is it wrong that all the guys in the Geek Room were like YEAH!!  That’s right – I’m throwing their sorry butts under the bus!)

Movies kids can’t watch because the kids think they’re hurting each other aka porn – huh??  Start holding your breath now

The words “honey you’re a genius” repeated over and over and over – good luck with all that

$100k home theater – sure honey, right after we win the lottery

Tv remote control gun – what the hell is that??

Black and Decker anything – here’s a gift card to Sears

Motorized cruising cooler that you can ride to the party – fine, but if you get a DUI – you’re on your own!!

CONSUMER WATCH

The best part of consumer watch is when Al sings the theme before or with Kidd – not because he’s really good at the theme, but because Kidd really wants to sing the theme on his own

iPhone2 will be announced later today – blah-blah-blah

Redneck Steve told Kidd that he is drinking more straight vodka now because vodka is cheaper than gas – I’m not sure what this has to do with Consumer Watch, but whateve

Al was right about airplane gas being mostly stored in the wings

Country wide has a new mortgage – the Pack Up and Drive Away Really Fast Mortgage (insert laugh track here)

The economy is forcing Extreme Home Makeover to change their slogan from Move That Bus to Move Into That Bus

Comedians are banding against text messages because people are texting the jokes

iTunes Top 5

5.  Take A Bow – Rihanna – went from #53 to #1

4. Pocket Full of Sunshine – Natasha Bedingfield

3. Shake It – Metro Station

2. I Kissed AGirl – Katie Perry

1. Viva la Vida – Coldplay

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4 Comments »

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  1. Correction needed: Ben, the geek room webguy, could not possibly have made a comment about a mistress being a great father’s day gift, because he knows full well I’ll put that bus in reverse and run him over again.

    -his loving wife, Ashley

  2. Cash Gifting ………The new addiction that is taking people over.
    There are many things that we as humans can become addicted to such as drugs, sex, alcohol, porno and food. The Viral Cashflow System is becoming way more addicting by the sheer fact, that people are not able to stop working this program. Juniors to senior citizens are seemingly falling prey to this viral epidemic. The buzz of this reverse half up compensation plan has people constantly going to the banks with wads of cash money. The bank managers are reporting that the lines at banks are getting longer and longer each day. People have been known to burst into a jig just by hearing ding dong…..FedEx. You would think that they were the millionaire winner of the lotto. One of the gifting leaders Mike Stokes was asked about this new addiction that is sweeping the gifting community. No comment was given due to his rushing to the bank. Big name gifting mentors, training and support, and a high tech back office has been accused of keeping this addiction going making it impossible to fail in cash gifting. If someone should ever come to you about the viral cash flow system. Run for your life. Then again would be that bad to make $10,000 in a week. Now that I think about. You can keep your drugs, sex, alcohol and porno flicks. Show me the money. Check out for yourself at http://www.catchingthecash.com

  3. I’m sorry, I’ve missed something. I saw the picture of BGJ, but who he hell is he… and why do we care?

    Dianthe, you rock at this, I miss hearing about Sydney though!!!

  4. Hey! I’m sad- where’s JSi’s spanish word of the day? 🙂


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