i can be bought

July 23, 2008 at 11:41 am | Posted in Uncategorized | 1 Comment

EWWWW MOMENT OF THE TODAY

Dude, you pee in bottles – Kidd to J Si – thanks, but i didn’t need a reminder

J SI’S “I’M GREAT AT EVERYTHING” MOMENT

J Si thinks he and George Clooney have about the same hotness

He’s thinks he’s about the same hotness as Brad Pitt

He absolutely thinks he’s better looking than Jake Gyllenhaal but will admit that Joe Jonas is better looking because he has cool hair

FUNNIEST LINE OF THE SHOW

“That was some McDonalds sue me coffee” – Kellie commenting on the temperature of the coffee that she burned her hand on

ON THE PHONE RIGHT NOW

“IAN!!! do you know what they told me?” aww – we’ve missed you Ian

THINGS YOU MIGHT HEAR ON TODAY’S SHOW

Kellie’s week can’t get any worse

J Si had a dream about a slumber party at the Jonas Brothers’ house

Shanon’s voice is a mix between Fergie and Jesus

Al met 2 really cool chicks last night

Big Al met 2 British girls who are traveling the world and they’re staying in a hostel about 10 minutes away – the girls are in their early 20s and Al was amazed that they were able to take off that kind of time and that they could afford to travel the world at their age – Kidd says it’s because foreign countries aren’t as productive as Americans because they take so much time off – then he tried to call out BGJ by saying that the British never invented anything – Kidd says Americans invented the iPhone – BGJ says the British invented Jaguar (pronounced Jag-U-Are) and then Kidd said Americans invented Freedom – then BGK threw down the trump card – “The English invented The Office” – sorry Kidd – I’m not even a fan of The Office but BGJ schooled you on that one

HIZZLE

Lauren Conrad is pulling the diva move

Christian Bale says he didn’t assault his mom and sister

Nelly and Ashanti have broken up and Nelly is now dating Joss Stone

Britney Spears was photographed smoking in front of Sean Preston

LOVE LETTERS TO KELLIE

If your girlfriend never wants to see you, she’s either bored with you or she doesn’t need you

If you’re the first girlfriend after your boyfriend’s damaged relationship, it sucks to be you

If the only thing you and your wife fight about is why you don’t put the toilet seat down, your life doesn’t suck – seriously?? GET OVER IT!!! Though I will thank you for your letter because it led to the new hit song, “I can flush a toilet with no handle bars”

HOME DEPOT SCAM

2 hot chicks come and clean your windshield and then ask for a ride to McDonald’s – they both climb in the backseat – on the way to McDonald’s they begin to undress and then one of them climbs in the front seat and starts kissing you while the other one steals your wallet – this is no Urban Legend – it happened to me on July 8th, 8th, 10th, (insert Looney Tunes song here …) – WHEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!

Omarosa vs. Wendy Williams

5 minutes of my life that I’ll never get back – are there 2 more annoying people on the planet? Add to that the fact that they were together – ugh. can someone poke me in the eye with a rusty nail now?? Wendy accused Omarosa of being an Angry Black Woman and Omarosa inferred that Wendy is a buffoon – Omarosa asked Wendy if she’s had a nose job – blah-blah-blah – I think they’re both about on the same level, Omarosa is just packaged a little better – I’m not sure how either one of them has managed to extend their 15 minutes but they’ve both made their careers on being obnoxious – I don’t know what Omarosa’s appeal is – and Wendy, well people watch her because she asks the hard core questions – but mostly because she’s a hot mess – I can’t believe Kidd compared Kellie to Omarosa – yes, Kellie can be direct and to the point, but she’s not rude and has manners – if you’ve got some time to waste, here’s the video – catch it before Fox removes it from You Tube


FLOBOTS!!!!!!

Random facts about the Flobots

They’re like the socially conscious rock/rap band

“No Handlebars” is about accepting your own power

“Rise” is about what you do with the power and how to make a positive change

Brer Rabbit was a teacher and Kenny O (drummer) worked with disabled adults

Mackenzie is the only girl and she’s a violist

If they were on a reality show, Mackenzie would kick Jesse (bass) off the island because he has cooler hair than her

They have a non-profit organization to promote the cause – fightwithtools.org

SHOWBIZ TOP 5

#5 – Nick Hogan will be 18 on Sunday and has to move to an adult facility

#4 – Sherri Shepherd is telling all her business including her crackhead sister, her promiscuity and her multiple abortions

#3 – Madonna is physically and mentally exhausted

#2 – Miley Cyrus says “7 Things” is not about Nick Jonas

#1 – Christian Bale is denying all assault allegations

FREDDY UPDATE

If you want to see Freddy – come to the show on Friday – Freddy and his band are going to be the house band for the show on Friday and they’ll be set up across the canal and will perform during the breaks

I HATE KIDD KRADDICK

That’s what Kidd took away from a newspaper article that interviewed Jessica Billings – she works at Shipley’s Donuts in Tupelo and is helping to collect music and movies for the troops for an organization called Tunes 4 the Troops – she wants to be a DJ and in the interview she talked about how she listens to the station that we’re on ALL DAY LONG – until the Kidd Kraddick show comes on – then she changes the station – huh?? Are we that bad? so Kidd (being Mr. Non Confrontational) decided to call her – except we couldn’t figure how to call Shipley’s since we have that anonymous call feature on the phone – exactly how many morning radio DJs does it take to disable call rejection from your phone?? We were finally able to get Jessica on the phone and as usual, she changed her tune once we talked to her in person – “oh, that comment about you was supposed to be off the record – I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings – I really think y’all are funny – I just like to listen to music” – um, hello Miss “I Want To Be a DJ” – I hope you remember this moment when people want you to shut up and play music – anyway, she seems pretty desperate to get into radio because she thinks this Craig Horton dude is hot (and way hotter than Kidd Kraddick)and said she would sleep with him – um, ew. You’d sleep with Mr. Bean to get into radio? You do know that there is no money in radio, right? Take it from me! But Kidd took the high road and offered to give her $100 to donate to her music and movie drive – see, we’re nice people

no, this is not Mr. Bean – it’s Craig Horton

SWEET FANTASY FAN CONTEST

Each member of the show is going to pick one person for the Fantasy Fan contest – so, everyone decided to list some of the criteria that they’ll be looking for in the person they’ll choose

Kellie – basically, a lesser version of herself

1. Kellie has to be your favorite

2. Have to be excited to be here but not be an over the top trembling , shaking , crying, excited mess

3. Has to hold celebrities in a place of reverence because all celebrities are better than we are

4. Have to love doing stuff to you as much as Kellie does – manis, pedis, facials, etc.

5. Have to be pretty but in a “non-threatening to Kellie” way

Al – um, yeah – a hot chick

1. Has to look good in a bikini or bikini type bathing suit

2. Has to love the beach

3. Cannot be afraid to do a tequila a shot before noon

4. Needs to have nice toes

J Si – someone who has the same 12 year old mentality that he has

1. Has to do bits with him

2. Has to speak another language besides English, Spanish or British

3. Can’t have a better laugh than J Si

4. Has to be good at improv

5. J Si has to be your favorite

Kidd –

1. Has to be good at skits

2. Has to agree with something Kidd says at least once during the show

3. Cannot be taller than 5’7″

4. Need s to have a 3 digit IQ

5. Has to believe that Kellie is wrong most of the time to balance out dianthe being up Kellie’s butt all the time

Um, hater! Don’t hate because I recognize the greatness of Kellie Rasberry – I recognize the greatness of Kidd Kraddick too – just not as often – but hey, I can be bought – if you would like to increase my paycheck by 50%, I would be glad to expound on the greatness of Kidd Kraddick 24/7 – c’mon Kidd, let’s work something out!

J SI IN THE MIDDLE

Paul tried to call Kinsey to apologize – but Kinsey is still hurt and hasn’t accepted his apology … yet – J Si thinks she’ll forgive him eventually but in the meantime, J Si is still BFFless – hang in there J SI – Kinsey won’t hold a grudge forever – it might take some time – ok, a lot of time – but she’ll get over it – take the advice of the wise and wonderful Kellie Rasberry – the only thing that is going to make it better, is time

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1 Comment »

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  1. I would rather be short and disliked by Jessica than resemble Mr. Bean. LOL


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